Don't Try to Fix Me, I'm Not Broken.

Lucky me got to start reorganizing my room..

Throwing away things I don't need or want anymore. Old things left from High School or last year that just don't need to fill the space in my small personal confinement of Harvard, Illinois.
I found that picture of me and you.
We were sixteen. And I was so ridiculously in love with you.

Some people who rummage through old things keep them to remind them of the good times. To remind them to not let history repeat itself.
But I ripped it up and threw it away.

I don't need the reminder of what we used to have. I was in love with you from four years ago, not now.
We grew apart and that's okay.

My only fear right now is just never finding that guy that will make me a crazy about him as I was about you. I remember what that used to feel like. I'm just worried I'm never going to find it again.
I tried putting myself out there. Didn't work.
I put such a bitch exterior out there now; I guess because I'm just protecting myself. I like it better that way almost I suppose. Nothing feels better than being able to read a guy and all the b.s. he's trying to get past you.
Please. I've met plenty of guys like you before, you don't surprise or intrigue me at all.
Get lost, please.

Things will happen when they're meant to. That's just the way things are right now though.

On a different note, life in general has been pretty nice. Just like it's all been put on pause though. I'm just coasting. The only friends I have up here each live in opposite directions from my town and it sucks. People who I thought were my friends just really want something from me.
Everytime I get a text message from someone in Northern Illinois that's not from Rosie or Roni, all I can think is "What do you want from me now?"

I'm starting to despise my phone. Damn you piece of technology that tempts me to connect with people that aren't worth my time!
I get bored and what do I do? Text. More than likely if it's not Roni, Ashley Sue, or Rosie it's someone who I don't need to be talking to.
Fucking Harvard and it's lack of fun activities to keep me busy.